"If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia."
"Oh, I don't blame Congress. If I had $600 billion at my disposal, I'd be irresponsible, too."
"If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning."
"We're living in a golden age. All you need is gold."
"The sooner all the animals are extinct, the sooner we'll find their money."
"The big print giveth and the fine print taketh away."
"We'll try to cooperate fully with the IRS, because, as citizens, we feel a strong patriotic duty not to go to jail."
"Don't spend $2 to dry-clean a shirt. Donate it to the Salvation Army instead. They'll clean it and put it on a hanger. Next morning buy it back for 75 cents."
"I don't have any use for bodyguards, but I do have a specific use for two highly trained certified public accountants."
"I owe the government $3400 in taxes. So I sent them two hammers and a toilet seat."
"I'm proud to be paying taxes in the United States. The only thing is - I could be just as proud for half the money."
Quotedb: The Quotations Database
